Workaholism
And The Seven Dwarfs
There
are stages a person goes through after a experiencing a traumatic
event and there are stages a person goes through when overcoming
a substance abuse problem. These are psychological patterns, mostly,
but they can manifest themselves physically as well.
What
follows are the seven stages of the workaholic, easily remembered
by their eerie correspondence to the seven dwarfs who, as you
no doubt recall, were always happy to simply whistle while they
worked.
|
He is
the youngest and most naive of the group, and the only one completely
bald and beardless.
Like Dopey,
the workaholic believes innocently in his own abilities and sees
nothing wrong with what he is doing. In this stage, the male workaholic
is also beardless.
|
Doc is the only dwarf to wear glasses which, in the cartoon world,
equates to an advanced intelligence. One might then presume he looks
at the world more analytically than the others.
The workaholic
in stage two is slowly beginning to realize what he has gotten
himself into but can still rationalize his own behaviour and map
out all the tasks that need to be completed. He is organized,
with a place for everything and everything in its place.
|
Perpetually in a good mood, as indicated by his jovial facial features,
Happy is, in a word, really quite pleased with the state of things.
The workaholic
in stage three is still quite happy as there is still quite a
bit of enthusiasm left over from stage one and the organized mindset
of stage two has helped to harness and tame any potential causes
of stress. Things are moving along just fine.
|
|
|
The dwarf with the weakest immune system, Sneezy is always fighting
off a cold, yet never calls in sick.
While things
seem to be going swimmingly for the workaholic at work, his home
life begins to suffer. He is tired due to a lack of sleep, his
mind continuing to wander long after the lights are out, and perhaps
he is also not eating as well as he should. This slowly begins
to infiltrate his at-work persona, so slowly that he doesn't even
notice it coming until the day he inadvertently snaps at one of
his co-workers, yelling at them for something that, two stages
earlier, would have only been considered a trivial matter.
|
Grumpy is never pleased with anything, as one can easily tell
by his eyebrows. In the cartoon world where anything is possible,
it is Grumpy who demonstrates the incredible feat of frowning
and whistling at the same time.
As far as
the workaholic in stage five is concerned, nobody is doing anything
right. One will commonly hear the following phrases, in alternating
sequence:
"Don't
talk to me."
"I'm busy."
"Get the fuck out of my office." |
Shy, sweet and unassuming, Bashful will always put others before
himself. Not coinicdentally, he is the dwarf most often forgotten
when people are asked to name all seven.
Guilt, stress
and a written warning from a superior will quickly force the workaholic
from stage five into stage six, whether he wants to go or not.
"Look,
I'm really sorry I snapped at you the other day, I've just been
under a lot of stress. Please, stay in my office and share your
thoughts with me."
|
While it might be considered dangerous in a mine environment, Sleepy
pushes on, even though he is always only eight rapid eye movements
away from a deep slumber.
In this final
stage, the workaholic cares very little about anything except
for the next time he will see his bed. His production suffers
and he stumbles forward through stage seven until he can either
take a vacation or take it no more, waking up only briefly to
call in sick and then smashing his alarm clock when the snooze
button goes off nine minutes later.
|
|
